The key is to exit in style:
Pittsburgh police say an off-duty city firefighter has been arrested after stealing a security truck from the Rivers Casino and leading police on a short chase while driving drunk.
…
Police say a cruiser was damaged during the chase, which ended in a neighborhood near where the firefighter lives.
Nobody was [...]

Months having passed since I thought about Las Vegas Hilton’s magnificent Twitter feed, I decided I should think about it. This was a mistake.
They’ve barred me from their goddamn Twitter.
No joke:

It was bad enough when they re-86′d me from their casino via Twitter last June.
I doubted any card counter had [...]

For some of us math causes terror. If you’re a statistician, terror causes math, as it just did for Nate Silver who mathematically proves things are cool, the periodic crotchbomber or successful hijacking notwithstanding:
[T]he odds of being on given departure which is the subject of a terrorist incident have been 1 in 10,408,947 over [...]

Merry Christmas, winners! We are all champions. We should love ourselves. We are taller than average, strong of heart, curious of intellect, not balding (so much), we jog almost once every week. We are the reason America rules over the moon. Did you know they use the US dollar in Panama in lieu of their [...]

I, myself, am in such a giving mood I went blathering onto Arnold Snyder’s site not two hours ago on Christmas Damn Eve and wrote an extensive epistle clarifying points made in a previous pithy epistle about the limits of prosperity for card counters. Noel. Those bright blue links are for clickin’.

In the context of a blackjack trip your goal is obvious — to beat the fuckers out of the money — and life is unproblematic. You know what you want. Your energy down to the lees is used for the kicking of ass. Period. The End.
You get to feeling exalted. You are a baller [...]

Among other things: It’s a good way for degenerate card counters and loathsome Mississippi shithole casinos to keep in touch over the years.

UPDATE: @ipbiloxi has since deleted the tweet above. Some senior person must have ordered the marketing team in charge of their Twitter not to correspond with card counters. Advantage play is always [...]

A blogger named Jarrett has a long interview with an anonymous professional blackjack player. It’s well worth a look if you’re interested in such stuff.
The counter happens to be a Christian and like most card counters, not entirely insensitive to ethical pangs, of which there are lots if you spend any time in casinos [...]

Welcome to the fourth installment of This Week In Madness, a lightheared and frequently sickening look at gamblers gone a hair beyond the pale. It distresses me to write these things for you. Once every week I have to spend an hour or two reading and thinking about suicide attempts, bankruptcies, devastated lives, and remembering [...]

Governor Ed Rendell, who brought slots-only casinos to Pennsylvania in 2004, now wants table games (and the $250 million he expects them to add to the Keystone State’s bottomed-out coffers through license fees and taxes) so badly, he’s threatening to lay off 1,000 state employees if the legislature doesn’t resolve its impasse over table-game legislation [...]

Ethicist Jack Marshall today has a great post on the Terry Watanabe case. Characterizing casinoland as an ethical black hole, he compares it to the Chinatown of ethically black-holish Roman Polanski’s movie: “a place where normal expectations and values don’t apply, and chaos and tragedy reign.” He ends up shrugging his ethicist’s shoulders and quoting [...]

From the spam folder this morning, the most poignant such appeal I have ever received:
From The Desk Of Mr. Benard Raoul.Auditing And Accounting Manager,
Dear Friend,
Everything that happens to one has spiritual significance. I was just leafing through the profiles of some names in the internet before I came through your name. Though, the internet [...]

This is what we like to see:

It’s exciting or I am colossally lame, deranged, self-obsessed. Maybe all of the above. The bastard isn’t even properly on sale (nor, I think, physically in print) but the deft manipulation of Google is giving some indication of who’s buying and giving me also the seed of a [...]

You don’t have to gamble badly and if you do gamble badly you don’t have to gamble badly through all your available funds and then embezzle from your boss, from your clients if you are a lawyer, from the Little League if you are a Little League president in Oklahoma, from the campaign funds of [...]

Fuck the casinos. Excuse me. My throat is clear, now, except not literally. I have an ache and mucus in the back of it after tramping through three Midwestern states in a petite rental Kia in the dead of the blizzard of ‘09. I like to be in Kansas in December.
Who doesn’t? I scouted [...]

Again this week: people gambled. Some lost, went to Dark Realms of the Psyche and made headlines for it. So we’re back with a second installment of our continuing series. Whee.

Kay Frances Thorn was given a suspended a sentence and ordered to pay restitution of $117,548.78 after pleading guilty to felony embezzlement from the Taylor [...]

Here is what the Terry Watanabe case means. Watanabe is the Omaha philanthropist who vaporized (he says) $112 million gambling with great enthusiasm in Vegas, primarily at Harrah’s-owned Caesars (sic) Palace in 2007. He was living in comped digs at the casino. He was drinking and drinking and keeping his head straight by taking the [...]

Counting cards has all these Matrix-like aspects. Casino = Matrix. Suits = Suits. Egregious Vinyl Clothing = Kosher. And when they catch you it’s going to be trouble. All of which is just an excuse to post this:

(Hat tip: Andrew Sullivan)